Friday, May 15, 2009

Smallville: Step Right Up and Don't Be Shy!

In the immortal words of The Boondocks' Huey Freeman: 'BOOOO!' *MASSIVE SPOILERS AHEAD*

'As it turns out, I AM a psycho killer'

(photo courtesy of

The peep show that was Smallville season 8 was indeed like watching a woman behind a glass wall: all promise and no pay off.
In the season finale 'Doomsday' we find Clark squaring off with the character the episode is named after. HOWEVER... NOT before lame and unneeded cameo from the Legion's Cosmic Boy showing up to tell him that he dies tomorrow! So, don't stick around and HELP or anything. And if it's such a BIG DEAL, why not just bring the Legion in at the right moment and TAKE DOOMSDAY? Really a stupid plot device to ensure another Legion flight ring can fall into the hands of someone it shouldn't.


So THEN we get the Justice gang together which was AT FIRST a WOO HOO! moment.

But sadly the Good guys turn on Clark and really just kinda fail to serve any real purpose except to allow Clark to COME OUT to Superman's pal, Jimmy Olsen. Which we will get to shortly.

Justice League Plan: 'HOLD the Monster!'
(photo courtesy of Smallville wiki)

They are ineffectual and down right dumb over all which says that the writers were merely using them as pawns in the story and not real living breathing characters in which to TELL the story.
In all of the disappointments in this episode, this may be the biggest of them all. Except for the running about bit for Bart and a waste of money shot on Green Arrow's bow coming out in a cool way, we don't really see the use of their powers. Couldn't Black Canary have used her power to at least BOTHERED Doomsday?

Clark's plan to separate Davis from Doomsday was his driving goal. He could kill the killing machine, but not the mind within. Chloe makes this happen for him BUT... DOOMDAY doesn't KILL ANY of the super heroes surrounding him at the time of his release. DOOMSDAY DOESNT KILL ANYONE IN THE ENTIRE EPISODE! Truly stupid. There's lots of knocking about people and the Holding-the-little-girl-by-her-throat-at-arms-length scene.

And then we get to THE FIGHT. Clark can lay into Doomsday because there's no humanity in him. He's just a drooling carnage machine. And with no back up from his super buddies (because after awaking at the same time from the beat down that Doomsday gave them, the Justice Team just waits to blow up the building) DOOMSDAY WAS ALL HIS.

So at this point I'd like to tell you we had 5 minutes of knock down, drag out brawling between the LAST SON OF KRYPTON and the OTHER LAST SON OF KRYPTON. I'd like to tell you that at this point, all the pent up and hidden rage and anger building in Clark for losing the love of his life, most of his friends, and any chance at a normal life came out through his fists into the one thing that could take it.

I'd like to tell you that, but just like this season, I would be LYING.

Clark gets punched a few times which makes him fall backwards through some buldings and at that point the budget was eaten up for the fight scene. The big 'pay off' was that Clark ALMOST (once again) seems to FLY with doomsday in his arms to the place where they can both be blown up. Because what we did, since we can't kill him, is bury him alive... because he won't be able to dig out of it or anything. Really. I'm pretty confident in this plan.

After Superman's Pal Jimmy Olsen, on the trust he has with 'CK' and by 'CKs' request, gets Chloe and Davis to a never before mentioned 'wedding present' - a clock tower/loft/kinda thing he just 'couldn't get rid of' even though he was a junkie for most of the season and hitting up his rich friends for money to buy them. Dumb.

Of course, we have the Jimmy/Chloe moment of 'OH, I so understand you now Chloe and I still so love you' and 'Jimmy there's so much I want to tell you - wait a minute, you have a pipe sticking out of your midsection!'

Yes, Davis, upon waking up and witnessing the admissions of love proves what we all knew to begin with - HE'S A PSYCHO KILLER! Jimmy's last act of heroism is to kill Davis and save Chloe, proving in the end he, too was a hero.


At his funeral we get what appears to be all of the heroes, including Cyborg - maybe? But no Aquaman. There's a seemingly pointless scene with Jimmy's younger brother, who looks like he will grow up to be a villian on this show. And WHO BRING'S THE DEAD EX-HUSBANDS CAMERA TO A FUNERAL? Chloe gives it to the kid.

Some where along the line of this mess of a story, the City of Kandor (you know the City in a Bottle from Superman Mythos) is in an orb in the possession of Tess. It somehow explodes her safe from the inside, which leads Tess to blame Lois. Why? because she had dressed as a maid and broken into her house once. This DOES lead to the best scene in the show wherein Tess and Lois go all out in a fight that makes CLARK/DOOMSDAY look just plain dumb.

Of course this SOMEHOW makes the drawer on Clark's desk open up and SOMEHOW knocks the drawer out of the desk knocking open the box with the Legion ring in it that Lois decides is far more important than dealing with Tess at that moment. Which makes Lois disappear.

This means at the funeral of Jimmy Olson, we appear to have 3 deaths: Clark, Jimmy, and Lois. Oh yeah, 5 if you count Doomsday and Davis.

But by the end of the Ep, we learn that the death of Superman's Pal Jimmy Olsen at the hands of Davis, whom he felt he should save because everyone deserves a 2nd chance, causes Clark to realise it was his human connections that have kept him from becoming the real hero he is to become. So, he tells Chole goodbye and that Clark Kent is dead.

So, unlike the other tellings of the Doomsday story in which SUPERMAN dies and Clark is a victim, missing in another country, etc, we get CLARK'S death in this. It wont last 2 episodes into the next season and I might remind everyone CLARK WAS 'DEAD' THIS LAST SEASON TOO!

And finally... Kandor... was just a ruse to serve two purposes. One, to show that Tess - again - is a pawn to powerful Male characters and to unleash ZOD - again - on the world. WHO does he look like this time? Wel ZOD was the 'father' of DOOMSDAY...

The show lost me for a season the first time they gave Lana supernatural powers. And if she was a full time character in this season I would have probably stopped watching. It appears as though they may have lost me for their final season.


I will watch.

I like the abuse.

And Chloe.

Smallville Season 9: Dumb and Dumber - STAY TUNED.
Be sure to check out HOUR 42 this Sunday at 10pm CST to hear more about it.
(now to go read the 30 tweets from El Secreto on the subject - heh)

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